A drunk gets up from his bar stool and goes into the restroom. A few minutes later the bartender hears a blood-curdling scream. A few seconds goes by and he hears another scream. The bartender walks into the head and demands to know what's going on- the screams are spooking the customerss.

The drunk replies, "Every time I try to flush, something reaches up and queezes the hell out of my t.e.s.t.i.c.l.e.s!

The bartender opens the stall door looks in and tells the drunk, "You're sitting on the mop bucket!".